Category Archives: Conviction / Doubt

make it true

Posted on by under Conviction / Doubt, friends, God

who is to blame
for taking your name
and proving you bad about town

who stole your soul
held it high on a pole
and painted you up as a clown

you think you fly free
but it looks to me
like you never even left the ground

but it’s ok – to say
you live a life that let you down
it’s alrigh t- don’t deny
sometimes you trip and hit the ground

don’t pretend – i’m too good a friend
oh the things you thought you knew
you forget, or haven’t learned yet
wishing it won’t make it true

give me advice
while you’re paying the price
of stepping out of the light

you told me you won
but all you did was run
you never even put up a fight

a tear in your eye
life is passing you by
and you pretend you’re still alright

speak to me

Posted on by under Conviction / Doubt, Faith, God, My Favorites

i’m waiting
for a surprise
watching for someone i’ve never seen

if you’re there
you hear my prayers
take me where i’ve never been

i know i can’t expect an answer
but i ask anyway

speak to me
in the voice that jonah heard
one so real
i obey – or run away

i’m tired
of holding my breath
i cannot force you to speak

what might be you
i’m able to
ignore for the message i seek

speak to me
in the voice that Jesus used
one so real
i obey – or run away

explain

Posted on by under Conviction / Doubt, God


she’s had a bad day, that much is clear
her head rests softly on his chest
and i can sense her peace from here
that moment when the weary find their rest

and i wonder, sure i wonder
in all the world, why those two?
if destiny rules with whispers and thunder
what are the lonely to do?

everyone’s eager to speak for me
as if they can voice what i feel
but only God knows what words cannot free
that emotion that’s never quite real
cause there’s something inside
that i’m trying to hide
somethings i can’t explain

there are thoughts that defy
my mind and my eye
somethings i can’t explain
this world is big on breaking the rules
going too far, and worshipping martyrs
just like putting new hats on old fools
their knowledge doesn’t make them smarter
i join in the song of chance melody
buy into the lie that we’re all alone
cause i want to hide behind everything i see
to escape that light that points me home

everyone’s saying i should believe
what they’ve decided to preach this week
but there is a truth that surely must grieve
cause this world lies, and i won’t speak

standing still

Posted on by under Conviction / Doubt, God, Struggles

i’m a leaf caught in the wind
surrendering the all of me
to the breezes of these times
i miss the security of the tree

i don’t want divine rejection
i want to be right at first
but with every choice it’s harder
to imagine things much worse

so maybe i want pity
cause i’m lost without His will
can i be running from God
standing still?

i’m so afraid of hearing no
that i doubt i’ll hear a yes
it’s a mystery why some He shelters
and others aren’t so blessed

but a powerful God should know that
my heart cries out so pure
the deepest sorrow from the sick
is the existence of lost cures

so maybe i want pity
cause i’m lost without God’s will
can i be running from Him
standing still

many will say i’m choosing
a blindness to the signs
many will tell me give to God
what i still must hold to be mine

good boy

Posted on by under Conviction / Doubt, Girls, God

i went to church this morning
to chase a trace of some joy
i stayed through sunday school
oh – i was a good boy

i volunteered for the nursery
gonna pick up the toys
i’m coming back wednesday too
cause you know i’m a good boy

but all this doing the walk
oh i’m really only chasing (her)
this good i’ve done
with the wrong motivation

i stayed to help fold the chairs
cause she was there
i carried groceries up the stairs
cause she’d be there

i’m passing out Bibles on the street
cause she is there
and i’m at a meeting – on my knees
to offer up my most selfish prayers

all this doing the walk
oh i’m really only chasing (her)
this good i’ve done
with the wrong motivation

what i’m talking about

Posted on by under Conviction / Doubt, Faith, God, Struggles

another night has seen it’s day
another empty plea for company
am i just blind to the blessings out there?
or is something wrong with my prayers?

i follow rules when i study
hope You’ll lead me where to read
and Your words land like a stone
it’s not good for me to be alone

You are the truth i find hard to believe
are my granted wishes so far up Your sleeve?
maybe it’s too much to ask, too much to doubt
but i know You know what i’m talking about

You came to earth on a mission
save the lost at life’s cost
You endured the desert sun
and though You had 12, they chose to run

and Sunday school – it has taught me
God’s love falls from above
but searching this sky for rain
left me thirsty and weak from pain

You are the truth i find hard to believe
are my granted wishes so far up Your sleeve?
maybe it’s too much to ask, too much to doubt
but i know You know what i’m talking about

follow the rain

Posted on by under Conviction / Doubt, God, My Favorites, Struggles

this land i claim is hostile to me
yet i claim it’s my home

this land i claim bears no fruit anymore
yet i call it home

should i follow the rain
wherever it may lead?
should i follow what i want
or what i need?
should i follow the rain
wherever it may lead?
abandon what i want for what i need?

so i go out in the fields
and pray to a God a can’t feel

i know i feel a push to leave
but do You push without a pull to lead?

should i follow the rain
wherever it may lead?
should i follow what i want
or what i need?
should i follow the rain
wherever it may lead?
abandon what i want for what i need?

tears from cloudy skies

Posted on by under Conviction / Doubt, God

i bury what i want to say
deep under my breath
and i watch the clock just like
i’m marking time of death

but the rains are washing way
the layers of my lies
erosion to emotion
tears from cloudy skies

and i say ‘i’m sorry’ – you’ve heard it before
and i say ‘it’s over’ – you know there’ll be more
still you let me in from the storm

i apologize for what i’ve done
and what i soon will do
i can’t see what’s best for me
sometimes i hide from  you

the wind will bring me back
all creation tells me, “stay!”
the sky ignites in blue
warning me, “don’t run away”

and i say ‘i’m sorry’ – you’ve heard it before
and i say ‘it’s over’ – you know there’ll be more
still you let me in from the storm

this is the peace i wanted
this is the feeling i’ve found
heart poured from love
with a sky up above – a blue sky

raising me from the dead

Posted on by under Conviction / Doubt, Faith, God

i’ve walked on the edge and fallen too
i’ve never landed far from You
You pick me up off the ground

i’ve run and hid from Your will
hands over my ears i hear You still
i get lost, but i’m found

i am a child – please teach me how to grow
i am alive – but i act like i don’t know
that you – are raising me from the dead

i’ve sat by the fire denying Your name
i’ve swallowed the truth and hid Your flame

i’ve prayed for things i shouldn’t get
i’ve taken for granted things You haven’t given yet

but when i ask you forgive it all…

i am a child – please teach me how to grow
i am alive – but i act like i don’t know
that you – are raising me from the dead

prodigal’s poker face

Posted on by under Conviction / Doubt, God


sit down to the table
tell y’all my name
be nice to me please
i’m new to the game

ante up – for the priveledge
something – i’m willing to lose
slide the cards to me
i’m ready to choose

but all at once it is so clear
i’m in over my head
betting on shallow
but sinking so deep
and we’re playing for keeps

walk off like a good sport
trying not to cry
my pockets are empty
my well’s run dry

thought i would shock the world
knew i would pay a price
but it’s all over after
one roll of the dice

but now i know – it is so clear
i’m in over my head
betting on shallow, but sinking so deep
we were playing for keeps

trying to win back my pride
tossing my caution aside
i was never meant to be in this town
i left home – i let them down