Tag Archives: my stuff

1,543

Posted on by under Getting Over It, Girls

one thousand five hundred and forty three
times this old pain has felt new to me
like the beginning, i’ve stopped saying your name
i’ve even willing to take most of the blame

but it seems that everywhere i go
there’s a memory of someone i used to know
i still wonder about that look on your face
it looked like apathy made crueler in grace

i ramble, i ramble, see i never move on
tonight someone else just mentioned a song
and told me a story, it was not about you
i thought of you, i was not supposed to

my thoughts climb the fences, eat fruit from trees
the poisonous orchard of man made memories
i’ll end up sick doubled over and crying
telling strangers how i caught you lying

but the truth is that i wanted much more
than i deserved, that fact i ignore
i know that you simply didn’t desire me
questions hard, the answer easy

i know you’ll get married this year
you’ll invite me, and i’ll stay here
it wasn’t your fault for not wanting me
one thousand five hundred and forty three

bounty

Posted on by under Getting Over It, Sad, Struggles

a few more wishes roll in with the tide
like lava the earth can’t keep inside
i gather it up and dig holes to hide
these memories of a darker pride

i was walking a cluttered ocean floor
weighted with treasure but looking for more
i kicked my feet finally rising for air
stopped short the surface, while everyone stared

thrashing and screaming, breath was so near
someone was shouting, i couldn’t hear
i cried, “pull me up, i am heavy with gold”
someone was shouting, “just let it go”

ocean’s bounty pulled me down
never meant to see dry ground
it glittered all around me
but it was trying to drown me

i made my peace, with opened fists
it fell to be forever missed
i swore i’d never speak of that day
when i let it all slip away

prodigal

Posted on by under Conviction / Doubt, God

would you take me home if i asked to leave
would You wait for me when i’m slow to believe
when i ask to see what’s up Your sleeve
will You tell me “wait” and let me grieve

are You leaning in to hear me now
one servant in a massive crowd
You know what i’m saying when i don’t know how
do You ever want to speak out loud

do You sigh when You see me run
into the shadows, a wayward son
until i return pain in my lungs
asking, “Father what have i done?!”

would You give me peace in a warring land
and a joy that i can’t understand
do You ever stare at the scars on Your hands
remembering the price of this man?

fallen leaves

Posted on by under Hope, Love

hidden in the winter woods
bare and swaying in the breeze
she looks down upon the ground
as if to beckon fallen leaves

sweetly shy she shivers
blushes red with every dawn
till her lover comes with spring
to slip her new dress on

night

Posted on by under Hope

pinpricks in black paper sky
backlit by bright prying eyes
darkness stalks a lone streetlight
it flickers in its futile fight

swirling streaks of shadow gray
no sun to scare the clouds away
glowing moonlight as they pass
just as they had been forecast

second story

Posted on by under Death, Sad, Struggles

in the spring another fall
for the stubborn leaves that cling
to the now new budding branches
life pushes death out of the way
fluttering, twisting, fighting
bearing it’s own memory
these lonely strangers fall
once blessed with such a view
they gather in corners and whisper
tall tales from the elusive past
they wander dusty pavement
now slaves to old enemy breeze
settling on some cracked sidewalk
where Jeff loved Jane in 88
imitation immortality
fingers traced in wet cement
love now abandoned to excuses
once blessed with such a view

probably

Posted on by under Girls, Sad

if i took my turn under the lights
if i wasn’t home on friday nights
if i didn’t always need to be right
would she love me?

if i sang songs on the radio
if i sometimes said i have to go
if i wasn’t scared to tell her no
would she love me?

if i knew all of the latest bands
if i was there to hold her hand
if i was easier to understand
would she love me?

if i had some different skin
if i kept my faults hidden
if we had more things in common
would she love me?

if i was a lion and not a lamb
if i just didn’t give a damn
if i was not who i am
would she love me?

the time it takes

Posted on by under Getting Over It, Girls

i tell myself lies in the light of every day

when I say that this will go away
in 4 months, in 1 afternoon
in the time it takes to say ‘ I do ‘

i can’t tell a story without an ending
i keep reading signals you aren’t sending
but of course i will get over you
In the time it takes you to say ‘ I do ‘

whatever’s next

Posted on by under Faith, Love

he found her from the footprints in the snow
she ran away but she had nowhere to go
and no lie could be a fitting mask
one look and he didn’t have to ask

with an arm around her shoulder he stayed there
in the silence she knew that he cared
she cried until the tears froze to her cheek
he wiped her face and found the voice to speak

he said “i don’t know what you’ve been through
but whatever’s next i’ll go with you”

she wished she’d never heard his words before
but they’re often said by guys trying to score
everyone who’s held her has told her to lie down
and look for love in between sheets
(where it cannot be found)

but something in his voice closed her eyes
and she hoped for once love wasn’t telling lies
she leaned in to kiss him thinking that would make him stay
he put a finger to her lips and again she heard him say

i don’t know what you’ve been through
but whatever’s next i’ll go with you

if we kissed

Posted on by under Girls, Love, Sad

if we kissed would you slap my face?
would a kiss be out of place?
if i loved you and told you so
would you fold your arms and tell me no
like a parent with a little boy
pointing to an expensive toy
would you tell me “surely someone else”
“just leave this one up on the shelf”
i’m sure that’s what you’d say
so i’ll shove love out of the way
and trip and fall and crawl along
i’ll hum off-key an old love song
and forever i will pretend
i am nothing but a friend